It is six hours since I went to the race organizers and told them that I would not be able to meet the half way cutoff point. I had done 23 laps (46 miles) in 10:40. I had 80 minutes to complete 4 miles to make the cutoff. My 46th mile had taken me approximately 30 minutes and the mile before that about 25. I had done everything I could think of; put on compression socks, took a second dose of aspirin, sat for about 8 minutes "petting" my leg to try and get the swelling out, ice, change of shoes. None of these things worked. I know this time that my shoes were not tied too tight. I also know and feel confident in saying that I did not go out too fast.
In 2013 when we came to the Isle of Man we had hardly trained at all. I was coming off my discus-to-the-knee injury and hadn't gotten hardly any miles in. I went 76 miles at that race. This year I trained for the event; I did 7 workouts of a marathon distance or longer, I practiced my eating, I practiced my "fast walk" technique. So the thought going through my head as I was forced by my body to stop was: If I'm this well prepared, what is going on?
While I haven't had a chance to yet explore all possibilities, I was exploring most of them between mile 40 and mile 46. First, the problem is I can't raise my left foot. Sort of the same thing that happened in 2013 to my right leg, but coming from a different spot. Here's how the race unfolded for me.
The course this year, instead of being a half mile loop around the athletic center, was a 2 mile loop in the town of Castletown. Castletown is having a rejuvenation and wanted to have a big event, so they decided to do the 100 miles here. It is a lovely town with a castle (shock, I know, right?) quaint shops, old-time winding cobble stone roads, and lots of friendly people. The course started by the civic center, went out, wound through some local streets, out onto one of the mail roads, took a dog leg into a school, back on a main road, back into the village, down a pedestrian alley, back on local streets, back to the civic center where you went over the mats and tear dropped back around. The path leading from the civic center to the first local street was about 8-10 feet wide, a small fit for 100 people to fit through. Dave and I decided to start at the back of the pack, we thought that would help us get off to a controlled start. It did, we started off really nice. We found the local streets were mostly cobble, with many variations in elevation. There were spots where we had to go up on curbs and if you wanted to walk the tangents you'd have to come off the curb. In one spot they put a ramp to come off the curb, but it was only wide enough for one person, and at a 90 degree angle. The turn around in the school was about 120 degrees with some loose gravel. I found if I hiked there I could make the turn okay, but if I tried to RW I had to swing quite wide. Getting into/out of the alley was also a one person at a time affair and those turns were hard 90 degrees. There were many inconsistencies in pavement elevation, the first few laps I saw many people learning where some were as people scuffed their feet, stumbled, and almost fell. Dave almost went down in the same spot on laps one and three. I started warning him the spot was coming, then he ingrained in in his memory.
I would say this was the most challenging course I have ever been on. I tend to train on the roads of Owego. There are spots where the pavement is a little rough, but really our roads are pretty good. Marvin Park is really nice, the track is smooth. I almost never walk around 90 degree corners, especially not 12 per two miles.
Dave and I walked together for much of the race. We were hitting around 12 minute miles for a bit, then moved up to about 11:45. I felt good, was having to hold myself back. I picked it up a bit more at one point, I think doing a lap in 11:04 or so, but was feeling great. I would switch my technique around slightly to use different muscle groups, a strategy that had worked great for me in training. I was eating once or twice a lap. Mentally I was feeling awesome. But I noticed I felt a bit sore decently early. I decided to just not think about it.
Around 15 laps in I started to get a massive hot spot in my right calf and an annoying niggle in my left shin. I also felt the beginnings of a blister on the bottom of my left foot. I stopped, took my sock off, and put some oily stuff hoping that would help. After a few more laps the two hot spots were starting to really be hard to ignore. I decided to stop at the massage area and see if they could work some of it out. I stopped for about 6 minutes. The massage therapist was great, but it didn't help a lot. After another ten miles my calf did loosen up, which was awesome, but by that point the pain in my left shin was hitting about 8/10. I hobbled around a lap, looking at my pace and how much time I had left. I could still do it. It wouldn't be fun, but it could be done. At one point I got myself geared up and said, okay, time to start really RWing again. I was able to latch on to two really nice ladies and for about a mile I did pick it up, but that's all I could manage. The pain in my leg was just overwhelming. I kept going though, knowing that it was still possible. At 22 laps finished I had a feeling all was done. I was starting to limp pretty severely, and my left leg was just along for the ride. I decided I'd get around and tell our aid person that I was stopping. He was great, very supportive, tried to get me to keep going, helped me rest and see if I could get charged up again, but after sitting for six minutes, when I stood back up I almost couldn't stand. I told him I would hobble to the finish, just to make sure, and he would meet me there with our stuff.
As I walked about 30 minute mile pace to the finish, feeling the pain in my leg, I wasn't even sure what to feel. I'm still not sure what I feel. I'm so frustrated. I know I can do this, but this is now two attempts and two times I didn't complete 100 miles. I found one of the race directors and said thanks and spent some time with the physio. As I was talking to her I was expressing my frustration and just wanting to figure out/understand why this happened. She thinks it is a legitimate thought that the course did it to me. My inexperience in walking on different aspects of the course could've been enough to throw my body off. Now obviously the course didn't affect everyone, there are still so many amazing people out there powering their way through. As I look at the live updates I see many of them are veterans of centurion walks, and/or people from the Isle of Man. One event they have here is the Parish walk, which is 85 miles and takes them all around/over the island. It's a huge event that draws 1500 people each year. It goes everywhere, on gravel roads, you name it. So people around here have a rich history/culture of walking and walking on many different surfaces. I don't want to feel like I'm making excuses, but I just can't figure out why I can be so much better trained and not even make it to half way.
The though did cross my mind, silly as it is, that maybe my body just wanted me to save my first centurion number for the US list and I will have success at our race next fall. Seems silly to think though.
So it hurts, now everything hurts. My calves are tight/sore (stretching did not happen when I was done) my left shin just throbs. The blisters on the bottom of my feet hurt, and I spent so much time trying to be careful where I stepped, especially at the end, that I tensed up my shoulders like crazy and it hurts to lift my left arm above my head. I can think of few times where I hurt as much as I hurt now.
Once a day or two has passed I will have to sit down and seriously take a look at my goals and what I think I can achieve/accomplish. Goals have been on my mind a lot, why we set the goals we set, how we set goals, how to choose goals. I'm in a really big grey area with my goals right now and it will take some serious soul searching to figure out for sure what's next.
I gave it my all. I probably should've stopped a lap or two before I did. I hope I recover decently quickly. I really hope I can sleep...
P.S. - I want to be totally clear, I am not blaming the course. There were 48 people who finished the 100 miles and 32 people who finished the 100 miles for the first time and earned their centurion number. I guess I'm blaming my preparation, which is upsetting since I tried so hard to prepare well. it's the fine line between an excuse and a reason...
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